Saturday, November 8, 2008

What I Want For Christmas

Let me preface this entry by stating that I know that I am complete, and there is nothing in this life that I need. I know this.

However, it is human nature to desire things in this world. There is something that we are taught that tells us that life is much more enjoyable when you have fun things. And right now, in my present state, I agree. I want things!!!

It's been such a very long time that I actually had a real Christmas list of things I truly desired. I have always been blessed in the past, that when there was something I wanted badly enough, I could just go and get it. Simple as that.

But then this economy hit, and my 3 children began eating me out of house and home. I mean seriously..we got nothing. All my money leaves the bank and goes directly into feeding my kids and paying for school stuff. I know the schools are poor too, but seriously...some of the prices on things that were free when i was growing up are absolutely ridiculous.

So now, for the first time since I can remember, I have a Christmas list. It is quite extensive. This list will probably be around for a while because I know that if I am truly blessed, I will hopefully receive perhaps two things on my list, which leaves the rest for next Christmas. My husband will probably receive everything on his insane Christmas list, because..well..he buys it all and then passes them off as family presents. I generally encourage this I suppose, because after I find that he buys all this stuff, I cant bring myself to ask for anything. I mean.. we can't afford anything for me. The Christmas present I was promised last year, I received in August of this year. And that was only because I found something similar to what I wanted at 1/3 of the price. So you can see I am having trouble being hopeful.

So why am I putting all of this stuff down in my blog? I am praying that if I let my desires out there into the universe that God will hear them and my chances of a good Christmas will increase. Selfish? absolutely! But I feel that I deserve to be selfish for once!

So God.. In all your power and glory, I am thankful in knowing that you will supply my hearts desires. I thank you in advance for making this the best Christmas ever for me. Thank you for finding a way to provide me with some of these amazing things. In other words.. You Rock!

Black Simply Vera Tote Bag at Kohls- I know it seems silly that a purse is the first thing I list, but if you only saw this purse, you would understand. It called to me across the department store. I saw it and as I drew near, it captured my heart. It was lovely, divine, and 30% off.

Rock Band 2 - I am a stay at home mom who has sacrificed her dreams (temporarily) for the sake of raising her children. I need to still keep my passions alive. I need to rock out through my X-box 360 to fulfill all my rock star fantasies. Thank you for providing me with this opportunity God. I have a grand feeling I might open this up at Christmas...mainly because its on my husbands list. :)

Brida- It's a book by the amazing and wonderful author Paulo Coelho. It's one of the two translated books by him that I have yet to read. I hear wonderful things. I know.. its just a simple book, but I can't afford to buy books mainly because I can buy my kids pop tarts, and lunch for the week with the money I would need to spend, and that is more important. My public library does not carry this book (boo!!) so I am kinda stuck.

Gift Cards - God, I worked really hard to lose 20 of the 45 pounds I gained from my pregnancy. Now, I know that I can't afford to continue my diet right now, so its put on hold, but I would sure like to have clothes that actually fit me that can help me feel good about myself again. My closet is a size 4 and a size 14. I am a size 8 currently. Please help me out with this God. Thanks!

The Kindle - This I feel really guilty about putting on here, because it is expensive, and I don't really NEED it. I just want it! It's so cool! I can load all these books on it and take it wherever I go. I am really big into reading and I just love it. Anyway, there are things I need more, but God..if you can find a way work this, I will do an amazing dance for you! Sigh.. I wish you accepted bribes.

Red String (Kabbalah) - I find something truly beautiful about wearing the red string. I love what it stands for, I love that it serves as a reminder, But most of all, I think that it would really help me..on my path. I am just learning about it, and yes, there are things that are hard for me to understand and agree with, but this is not one of them. I love it. And since my friend Daniel told me that red curling ribbon will not suffice (sigh) I will add this to the list. God, if someone blesses me with a present that has any sort of red string around it, I am taking it as a sign. :)

Whew.. that felt good and extremely selfish all at the same time. Damn you ego..just let me be.
This is my dream board ( in a sense ). I expressed my desires and now I am happy to see what comes of it all. I expect good things. For I am hopeful.

For those of you who read this, I will let you know post Christmas what happens.


Update: My lovely and wonderful friend Cheryl just bought me Brida as a present. I am so excited!!! Thank you Cheryl !!! One thing crossed off my list. YAY!

1 comment:

Cheryl said...

I hope that above all else, as silly as it sounds, you get Rock Band 2. I have Guitar Hero, and it's very cathartic to have your 13-year-old dreams finally satisfied, if even in a fantasy game world.

And BTW, I think you should get credit for the red curling ribbon, no matter what Bobby says. It's the thought that counts, right?