Sixth Grade Theology

When I was in the 6th grade, I can remember sitting in the basketball courts of Greenwood Lakes Middle School during recess and sharing opinions on the worlds problems with a few of my dear friends. We would talk about politics (although all we really knew was whatever our parents told us on the matter), world hunger (when we don't finish our meals at the restaurant, does it really have an effect on the children in Africa who have no food?) and of course theology.

The theology discussion was always the most interesting because our views were so different. We were only twelve years old and yet we had different elaborate theories on what our life's purpose was and our views of the afterlife. I remember my friends saying that the purpose in life was to love. Pure, simple, undeniable. We loved it. I remember hearing that it was to help others and those yet to come. Again.. beautiful, caring, loved it. I remember on the day I shared, I really didn't have an answer to our lives purpose, but I had a viewpoint. I told our group that despite everything I learned and had been told, that I did not believe in hell as being an afterlife. I believed that the life and the world that we were living in was in essence hell and that our purpose was to fight through, keep our faith, and find our way back to God. If we failed to do so by our life's end, we were forced to come back and try again. If we messed up and ended up ax murders or something, we were forced to come back again and again until we got it right. Then we would leave this place and go to heaven. I remember it was the first time this view had ever occurred to most of them, but they were accepting of it. Ahh to be a kid again.
Now I know, or believe, that there are several details of my theory that I don't agree with today. For instance, the belief that we have to somehow prove ourselves to God in order to be rewarded. I believe that THAT pressure to please came from man and not God. I do not believe that God sets out to punish the behavior that he in essence allows us to act upon. But the part about the life we are experiencing to be the closest thing to hell that we experience. That part I believe I had right. Our disconnection from our true selves. Our inability to see or experience God in our day to day. Our misinterpretation of the ideas of the brain and the words of other men as being our truths rather than the eternal truth within. All of that is hell. We experiencing the opposite of what is true constantly. And that experience. The agony of the experience, the pain.. THAT is hell.
What's funny is that as I got older, I brushed my theories under the table and began to mock them in a sense. I was evolving and learning "the truth" about everything, when in fact, all I was doing was moving farther away from the truth. We know more truth when we are babies, toddlers, elementary school kids than we do as adults. All the education we receive to thrive in this world most often does not help our souls thrive.
It made me ask myself as I went to yell at my 8 year old about his recent math grades. Is this really important. Sure this society holds it as being important, but is it really something important to our life experience? Is part of the reason my son is here is to get A's in math? I don't think so. He has a divine calling which has little to nothing to do with his math grade. So instead of yelling at him, I hugged him and ask if he did his best. he told me he did, and I told him that THAT was all that mattered. I loved him, God loves him, and he is perfect.
Of course he made a complete mess of his room and I screamed and yelled at him for that.
What?? I told you I am not perfect. I am still learning. And I got a lot more to do.